Sunday, December 20, 2009


i'm literally gagging even as I type this but it's one of those things I need to address. Dunkin Donuts ..decided it was fine to come out with a tuna sandwich. Not only did they think the idea was really good but they also thought it was cool to constantly advertise is everywhere I go. HUGE billboards, commercials, ads in the newspaper, etc. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY EYE BALLS. Every single time I lay eyes on it, I either scream some sort of a "OH GOD THATS DISGUSTING" cry or simply make gagging throw up noises.

It reminds me of when I worked at the indie movie theater in Red Bank and on Sundays I'd work with this very old crotchety woman with un-natural red/purple hair. It was just she & I, working for hours. Small talk here and there but mostly it was her complaining, me listening/making eye contact, her dropping her cane and I'd have to go get it...things like that. However, one day our relationship really took a turn when she asked me to walk to Dunkin Donuts and buy her a steak & egg sandwich there. Really dude? Steak.And.Egg. I understand the egg part but...steak? What farm are they getting this cut of beef from? The imaginary crazy cow farm that exists strictly in the test tubes and petri dishes of a laboratory far far away? Cool. Needless to say, I walked there and got the fucking steak sandwich for her. Grease soaked bag and all. I watched as she ate it with delight & satisfaction.

So I'm assuming there is an audience for this tuna sandwich but I am NOT a part of it. DD, please stick to delicious coffee & chai tea.